“I wish I could love you.”
***
We’re in bed, in post-coital bliss. He looks at me, knowing that I know the truth. 2 months into the relationship, he slipped in a comment. He tries to stop any conversation from happening. But I need to know.
“How old are you?”
“Why does it matter?”
“You told me you were 26. Are you 26?”
“No”
“How old are you?”
“Why does it matter?”
“Tell me.”
“I’m 21.”
***
I walk into him kissing my best friend on the balcony.
***
I run into his best friend, who asks me what I did for New Year’s. I tell her I was in Berlin. She says, “That’s weird. C was in Berlin for New Year’s too.” He hadn’t told her that he was with me.
***
Reading the last lines of his suicide note: “In the future, I see nothing but pain. That’s enough of a reason to end things now.”
***
It’s a lazy Sunday afternoon. My phone rings.
“Is this Raja?”
“Yes.”
“I think you know my boyfriend A.”
“You mean ‘MY boyfriend A’?”
***
“I was turned on by your brains. But I always thought you were ugly.”
***
“I believe Lebanon should be part of Greater Syria.”
***
ohmyhappiness 
feministarab
February 19, 2013
Yesterday, I was gonna send you a message to tell you that I feel that you’re not yourself these days. This is such a weird post, and it being this weird means something so not right with you.. Are you okay?
On the other hand, love it like always my dear Raja..
ohmyhappiness
February 19, 2013
Is it weird? Really? I’m good. I actually wrote this a couple of weeks ago. Nothing is wrong. Same old Raja. 🙂 Thanks for checking up on me though.
feministarab
February 19, 2013
Yeah i find it very weird.. I think it’s that maybe in my in-conscience I thought that after you had your vacation you’ll be having some positive posts. And this is not a positive post, Je ne sais pas 😛 as long as you’re good, it’s all good brotha haha.
Anyway the guy who cheats on you should be kicked in the balls, point finale.
Rawad Habib
February 20, 2013
One of the most interesting web pieces I’ve read so far!
*****
ohmyhappiness
February 20, 2013
Thanks!
Michael Aswad (@MichaelAswad)
February 20, 2013
Mmmmmmm I am trying to decipher if there is hidden meaning behind what you wrote ? If there is let me know so I can figure some logical flow to this.
BeirutBoy
February 22, 2013
woah. you must have really liked the guy for u to bear with all this shit! loved the post 🙂
ohmyhappiness
February 22, 2013
Haha! It’s not one guy! They’re all different guys. I don’t think anyone could handle that much from one guy. 🙂 Thanks for reading!
BeirutBoy
February 22, 2013
Ok now it makes more sense. lol. De rien!
abdel (@abdelxyz)
March 2, 2013
who? who?!
***