It’s a dark night in Beirut, the San Francisco of the Middle East. This darkness is powerful. It represents Beirut’s past, its present, and its bleak future. But tonight, it also represents the state of gay people in this Middle Eastern city by the sea.
Hassan, whose name I have changed to protect his privacy even though there are thousands of Ahmeds in Lebanon, is sipping on a gin and tonic, and in doing so, powerfully defies his religion. For him, having grown up in a Muslim household, religion has turned its back on him, because you see, Hassan is gay. A gay Muslim. In Beirut. Shocking.
Hassan tells me how hard it is to come out in Beirut. This story is very specific to the Arab world, because everywhere else on this planet, it’s so easy to come out. We are sitting in Bardo, a gay bar in Hamra. Madonna and Fairuz sing a song together, embodying the endless contrasts that the New York City of the Middle East represents. Hassan is a graphic designer by day and a belly dancer by night, as are all Arab gay men. When he first told his parents he was gay, they were upset. His mother even cried. In this conservative country, it is the last thing a parent wants to hear.
Beirut’s tumultuous history has meant that gay people have been ostracized for years. I will now make a comment about how war often affects gay people more, but I won’t offer any actual evidence for it. I want you to feel how much suffering these people have gone through, and I’ll use the war to make you feel bad for them. So, yeah. War is very tough on homosexuals.
Hamed Sinno, the openly gay frontman of the Lebanese band Mashrou3 Leila, is gay. His gay voice represents the entire Arab world. Through his gay songs, he captures the angst of the youth, singing about things no one gay has ever sung about in a gay way. One of the band’s most famous songs is called “Shim el Yasmeen”, a gay song about gay love. Hamed Sinno is gay. Beirut is the Provincetown of the Middle East.
In the clumsy offices of Helem, Samir looks up from behind his desk, surrounded by rainbow flags. The flags, powerful symbols of gayness in the West, have now been adapted by this NGO, the first gay one of its kind in the Middle East. It’s a sign that Helem is a safe space. You almost feel like it is a safe space in the United States. What does Helem do exactly? I did not care to find out. The mere fact that they exist was enough of a statement because, after all, it’s so hard to be gay in Beirut, the Mykonos of the Arab world.
Samir tells me about Article 534, a clause in the Penal Code (Samir doesn’t even laugh when saying “Penal”) of Lebanon that dates back to the days when Lebanon was under Ottoman control. One can imagine that every year, thousands of gays are arrested under that law. I can’t confirm or deny that number, so let’s just go with it. Samir explains that it is very hard to be gay in Beirut.
After our meeting, he takes me to a sauna on the outskirts of Beirut. On our way, we drive by buildings still riddled with bullets, a daily reminder of the war and how hard it is on homosexuals. Samir tells me about how a few months ago, the police raided a cinema where gay men used to go to have sex. This is horrifying in two ways. First, how dare the police infringe on the basic human rights of a human being. Second, how filthy Arab sexuality is, where men have sex with other men in movie theaters.
Once we get to the sauna, Samir tells me about how condoms are not used inside. This excites me and scares me at the same time. What a delightful mix of emotions this country brings. Inside, men have sex with men in a scene out of a gay A Thousand and One Nights. A gorgeous Lawrence of Arabia comes up to me, wearing only a towel. I have been in exactly the same situation in New York, London, Paris, Berlin, Barcelona, but this one is different because of the untamed sexuality of Arab men.
Later that night, I’m walking downtown, where it is not uncommon to see military men walking around with their guns. There is no reason for me to share this fact, other than to remind you that Beirut is a terrifying place to live in. Outside Beirut, it’s a different story for gay people, but I will not write about it, because that would require actual investigative journalism, and who has time for that? I don’t. I have a plane to catch, and I still need to tell you about all the Hezbollah flags I saw on the way to the airport.
On the way to the airport, I saw lots of Hezbollah flags. Pictures of martyrs look down on you, and your wildest Arab fantasies can come to life, until your realize the horrifying fact that they would cut off your penis (or so I imagine). I get on the plane with a full understanding of what it is like to be gay in Beirut, after having spent 48 hours in this, the London of the Middle East.
There are no lesbians in Beirut.
– END –
witchylisa
November 5, 2013
That’s a mama of a gay satire 😛
aguywithoutboxers
November 5, 2013
Great job, my friend! Thanks for posting this! Much love and naked hugs! 🙂
jeanakouri
November 5, 2013
Excellent 😀 Great job. Here’s a bit on what it’s really like to be gay here: http://jeanakouri.wordpress.com/2011/10/14/another-one-bites-the-dust/
rana
November 5, 2013
… You understood nothing…
Sharon McConnell
November 5, 2013
Article 534 of the Lebanese Penal Code prohibits having sexual relations that are “contradicting the laws of nature”, which is punishable by up to a year in prison. As a practical matter, enforcement of the law is varied and often occurs through occasional police arrests. In 2002, the police broke into a woman’s house after her mother claimed that her daughter had stolen some money and jewellery. Upon entering the house, the police found the woman having sexual relations with another woman and charged them both with the crime of sodomy
n April 2013, the mayor of Dekwaneh, a suburb north of Beirut, ordered security forces to raid and shut-down a gay-friendly nightclub. Several club-goers were arrested and forced to undress in the municipal headquarters, where they were then photographed naked. This operation was condemned by numerous gay rights activists.[5] Lebanon’s interior minister of the interim government, Marwan Charbel, supported the mayor of Dekwaneh saying, “”Lebanon is opposed to homosexuality, and according to Lebanese law it is a criminal offense.”
None of the major or minor political parties or factions have publicly endorsed any of the goals of these gay rights organizations. On 29 May 2006, Al-Arabiya.net ran a piece in which Beirut municipality council member Saad-Eddine Wazzan publicly called on Lebanese PM Fouad Sanyoura and Minister of Interior Ahmad Fatfat to shut down Helem.[12] The 16 June Friday sermons in the mosques of Beirut condemned homosexuality and pointed to the fact that Beirut has a licensed LGBT organization called Helem. The sermons also called on the government to provide explanations. The following day, Lebanon’s acting Interior Minister Ahmed Fatfat denied charges by conservative Muslim clerics that the government had approved a gay rights group
Karim N. (@NKarim5)
November 5, 2013
I’m printing this and hanging it in my room. Sarcasm makes me happy.
ohmyhappiness
November 5, 2013
🙂 I’m glad you liked it. Thanks for reading!
JB
November 5, 2013
Awesome. Just awesome. Thanks for posting.
ohmyhappiness
November 5, 2013
🙂 Thank you!
Sabz
November 5, 2013
I wish you wrote a piece that is more conducive to the status of the LGBTQ community in Lebanon. You surely wrote seriously about the subject several times, but all I’m getting from this is that you don’t care if you just fucked over a collective voice that’s been forming so slowly despite all conceivable challenges in Lebanon (and who have been successful only recently), as long as you get to sound smart and funny in the process. I don’t like to assume anything when I hardly know you. so please: help and listen to your friends and fellow activists based in Lebanon, bare with the language barrier that’s apparently there, read up on the actual history of Article 534, and provide constructive critique as to how they should continue to tackle the subject. But, seriously, try and reconsider the next time you sit and make sarcastic cracks that do no more than ridicule their efforts.
ohmyhappiness
November 5, 2013
I would argue that a good 80% of my posts are very constructive. Satire serves a purpose and it was fitting in this case. Also, clearly you did not understand the piece. I am not ridiculing the efforts of any friend or activist. That’s for sure. This piece is not about them at all.
Kevin O'Neill
November 5, 2013
OMG it must be so terrible for them there, especially with the war being so bad for gays. I must do something about this. I will give up my job in a corporate law firm and use my legal expertise to start an equal marriage campaign in Lebanon. We must help our brothers achieve freedom with our western liberal values immediately.
I just have one concern. Are all the men over there as short as Hamed Sinno? I need to have someone to look up to.
ohmyhappiness
November 5, 2013
Thank you for coming to save us. Don’t get upset if we hate you. We just don’t realize that you’re here to make things better for us. Also, sorry to break it to you, but every man here looks exactly like Hamed Sinno. I have a hard time telling them apart.
O Lee
November 5, 2013
Come visit me in Saudi! Oh wait, satire is just too easy here . . .
Sarah
November 6, 2013
Hilarious!!!! I love it.. And the last sentence: “There are no lesbians in Beirut”… Perfect.
mlynxqualey
November 6, 2013
Love it. & so agreed, satire is constructive. Plus funny.
KLM
November 6, 2013
This is the greatest thing ever. Of all time. Ever.
Hisham
November 6, 2013
It’s a ” everything is legal but nothing is permissible” type of environment. Would it be Paris, San Francisco…of the Middle East or Tehran of the Middle East. Same sh…
tina
November 6, 2013
What’s all this talk about satire? I thought this thing was for real. Beirut, the Salt Lake City of the middle east.
Fred Ahlawi
November 6, 2013
Brian Whittaker is in his plane as we speak, ready to crush your skull with high heels.
patrickgaley
November 6, 2013
Reblogged this on Patrick Galey and commented:
Bravo to Rafa over at OhMyHappiness.
Beiruti
November 6, 2013
Undoubtedly, 48 hours were not nearly enough for you to capture the real spirit of Beirut or its gay community. I’m sorry to say that as a Beiruti, your article seems to be nothing more than a rushed and premature judgement of a short and superficial trip. Your reporting neglects the multiple layers and complexities that makes Beirut…the Beirut of the Middle East.
Mohammed
November 6, 2013
I want to marry you and have your adopted babies after reading this because it’s all so very perfect
ohmyhappiness
November 6, 2013
🙂 I’m blushing! Thanks for reading Mohammed!
Roqayah Chamseddine
November 6, 2013
I’m so used to reading horrid pieces on Arab sexuality that I took this piece to be genuine and was close to responding that way lol. Brilliant satire
Zeina ZZZ
November 6, 2013
hahhahaha this is hilariously witty my friend! love it!
Nayla Papadopoulos
November 6, 2013
Excellent :)))
Danilo Aquino
November 6, 2013
Reblogged this on Hey, Danilo and commented:
1. Print
2. Frame
3. Hang
Alaa Abd El Fattah (@alaa)
November 7, 2013
there are no lesbians in beirut, that line is what makes this a great article
M
November 7, 2013
“This story is very specific to the Arab world, because everywhere else on this planet, it’s so easy to come out”. This is very inaccurate… please, lets e realistic….I am Lebanese who lives in London… get out of London Zone 1 and Id say Zone 2 and it would be difficult to come out as gay! Coming out is still a big deal in many many places including ones u’d think are very cool…. so lets not may it an inclusive thing to Beirut or the Arab world!
M
November 7, 2013
“This story is very specific to the Arab world, because everywhere else on this planet, it’s so easy to come out”. This is very inaccurate… please, lets be realistic….I am Lebanese who lives in London… get out of London Zone 1 and Id say Zone 2 and it would be difficult to come out as gay! Coming out is still a big deal in many many places including ones u’d think are very cool…. so lets not portray it an exclusive thing to Beirut or the Arab world!
Shan
November 7, 2013
During the worst days of the Civil War (1975-1991 ??), when I lived in Beirut, the gay community was the only community not divided by religion or political affiliation. We all were great friends and lovers. I, a Catholic Christian, lived in the Muslim sector of Beirut and almost all my lovers were Muslims both Sunnis and Shiites — more Shiites than Sunnis, though. The whole country was divided along religious lines and fought one another. The community met on Hamra Street roadside cafes and in pubs, bars and furnished apartments. Our favorite handout was Pickwick Pub and the Duke of Wellington pub.
In those days, the police did not interfere and it was so easy to find one’s lovers and friends at the Pickwick or the Duke. I loved my Muslim and Druze gay friends dearly and supported them as did they me. Gay foreign visitors knew where to go to meet our pretty boys and for a few years, despite the war, life was great in Beirut.
Serina
November 7, 2013
Im hanging this in my room for sure!!!!! Dammit this is funny and 100% accurate.
Kevin Moss
November 7, 2013
I’ll definitely have to use this if I get to teach my Global Sex class! So informative! Insightful! And obviously 100% accurate, which I am certain of, though I’ve never been there.
Otello
November 8, 2013
Pure Crap
Adrian
November 16, 2013
condescending bullshit.
antoinetteabboud
November 19, 2013
Reblogged this on what prevents you from dancing? and commented:
For White People™ curious about what it is like to be gay in Beirut, start here. Everything you need to know – or at least have a chuckle, at yourself.
raph
December 15, 2013
comPLETE douchebag. All I can say is I sure hope that plane ticket wasn’t a return back to Lebanon.
Lebanon Rebel
December 23, 2013
I agree with you about the fact that there are no Lesbians in Lebanon. We met, I hope you remember me. Eitherway, being a lesbian here I always get asked ‘I’m visiting from blah blah, where can i find lesbians in lebanon?’ I always want to answer ‘stop the bs, there aren’t any, there are just women who would marry a man and cheat on him with both men and women for the rest of their lives.’ I’m friends with these women, I’ve seen them do it. Mafi Lesbians who actually want a lesbian life. Eitherway, I hope we meet again and we chat a little, I’d really like that.
-LebReb.
Josiah Gagosian
December 27, 2013
As I’m sure you know, media special interest stories here in the U.S. have a similar condescending tone, although the circumstances might be quite different, the message is the same.
n2jm
June 21, 2015
Reblogged this on وهذا الربُّ لفي ضلالٍ مبين.
Patrick Barbieri
August 2, 2016
Thank you for the laugh. I’m sorry I didn’t come across your essay earlier. I’d have had the laugh long before now. I always find the drive through Hizbullah territory to the airport frightening, and then, so exciting at the same time: all those gorgeous Shiites.